the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
