Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
