My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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