I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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