you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Randomize
