Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
