I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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