And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
