Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
We're too hungover to prance.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
