And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
