I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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