Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
