You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
