I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Randomize
