Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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