Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Randomize