4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
