So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
