I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i came on her dog
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
