i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
