Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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