I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Randomize
