i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
accomplished twins. life is a go
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
