It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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