Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Everything about him screamed your future.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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