I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
We need to rekindle our bromance
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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