i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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