New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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