Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
