i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
is it fun? or sober?
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