is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
