I hate your face
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
