He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
