I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
tell your sister to shave her snatch
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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