He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
