i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
