last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
