This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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