hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I just found a bag of teeth...
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
