I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Mom said you looked used
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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