i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I touched a dick in church today
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize
