Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
