she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
