There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Randomize
