the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
