I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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