Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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