I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
