Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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