His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
