I faked an abortion last night.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
